i never realized why i love slash hated don draper in mad men so much until this last episode i just watched.
he is almost every man i know;
so loving, easily distracted by pretty things, he has a pained past, he is deep, depressed, and desperately wants to be more, but seems to be stuck in his cycle. and has this charm, that makes everything seem that it'll be OK, even when it won't.
its funny how in this episode (which i have been watchin for years and finally finished today, ironic when mixed with other events that happened, irony seems to be my other middle name) i was so happy for the fictional, but-all-to-real character. until he called the girl he was dating to tell her he just got engaged. little too close to home for this lady.
maybe that's how it is. maybe no one ever really changes. not really. not whats underneath, and inside them.
i wonder what I'd be like if i never experienced that. probably very naive. maybe happy but a little unfulfilled. i wouldn't be as jaded as i am. or as cynical. or scared of everything, cause it all hurts too much.
i wonder what this new epihinany means for what "I've always believed in. cause you don't know where you'll be"... i guess everything is perspective. and I'm probably the antagonist in other people's mind...
damn i wonder a lot.
